My talk from Daddy's service.

At my very last XC race senior year of college, my parents were talking to the mom of a teammate who was battling cancer, she was telling them how “the doctors can give me all kinds of expectations and limitations, but only God knows when my time will come”.  That was a month and half before Dad was diagnosed.  That became our motto and such encouragement through this time.  They gave my Dad 9months, he lived 2years&9months.

And that's how my dad lived his life, he just loved Jesus and he trusted him so much.  My dad just shone Jesus no matter where he was and who he was with.  

Email from dad…

“If God is for us who can be against us? Romans 8:31.  I read this in my quiet time today….  If this verse does not allow you to operate your life with no fear of the future I don’t know what will.  For you guys to fully understand the power of this verse, this thought you need to understand how amazingly powerful, personal and loving our God is.

 I want you 2 to live boldly for Christ.  Not to leave in fear of what may come since God is for us.  Even though God has allowed this evil cancer to enter my body, God is for me….. He can completely heal me if he decides that is the course to take or worse case I will live in the Glory of eternity with Him and no cancer.  If that happens what will happen with you guys and Mom?  Nothing to be fearful of since God is for you. God will bless your futures, and I am looking forward to what he has planned for both of you.  Remember to “delight in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your hear”

You guys are awesome! “

My dad was the best.

 He was my coach and personal cheerleader; he drove me early morning to soccer tournaments, critically evaluated my play to help me improve when I told him I wanted to be Brandi Chastain when I was older, researched Achilles tendonitis when I got injured in HS and listened to all my complaining about stress fractures, he was at every cross country race and would be wherever I told him to be on the course-sprinting across the course in his faded jeans, grey Santa Clara sweatshirt, and baseball cap, even fall of my sr year, I had to call him before every race.

He was my buddy: sang along to my favorite song for about 5 years “another dumb blonde”, spent Friday nights watching everybody loves Raymond with his exhausted graduate student, talked to me about boys and agreed that they are sometimes stupid, expressed his concerns if a boy was too serious to appreciate Dwight from the office, he drove to sb and back in one day just to take me to dinner because I was homesick.  He was the best person to verbally process to, the best listener ever

He was also my patient math tutor, until it got to stats my sr year of college, then he paid my friend to take his place.

He was my spiritual leader; met the lord on a day he convinced me to go to church, helped me through old/new/cd as a poor public school kid who never paid attn in Sunday school, sent me email tips on bible studies I led for my campers, my go to search engine for a verse, gave me club talk tips as I went through yl trainer-here you go dad this qualifies as my first club talk.  There would be times I would be walking into his room wanting him to pray and he would start before I even asked him to-he always knew what I needed when I needed it.

There is so much I will miss about spending time with my dad: my nightly bedtime cuddles, him kissing my head telling me “goodnight sweetie, you rock, you’re awesome, you’re the best”.  Conversations which turn into major spiritual insights without meaning to, laughing at the office, having him rub between my toes-pretty sure no other man will offer that, acting embarrassed when he sings even though I really love it, having him read the night before xmas, having him pray for me,

I don’t know what to do now that he is gone, I keep telling people I wish there was a guidebook, and like my coach told me yesterday “it isn’t good what happened to your dad, but life is still going to be good”.  Besides not knowing what to do with my dad gone, I don’t know where my career is taking me I’ve got 50 jobs and no clue where they are headed, Taylor is graduating college and he doesn’t know, my mom doesn’t know what she is going to do with her time.  But, as I was running a few days ago this song called banner of love came on and it talks about our responsibility to raise Jesus’ banner of love over the world…and I realized that is what my dad would want us to do, love Jesus, love each other, and lead others closer to Jesus by the love we show.