*if you have seen the musical "joseph and the amazing technicolor dreamcoat" you will understand the title...and if you have not, well, me and my father will gladly watch it with you anytime as it is one of our fav movies..
ok so little word of wisdom...never go for a 4.5 hour drive after you sit through an awesome church service. My whole drive back to school I was distracted by the awesome words I heard at church this morning, I need one of those little recording devices for when I am driving alone and have no one to write my thoughts down for me.Alright, so church today was about Joseph and how he overcame all the evil stuff thrown in his life, words used to describe these evils include; dysfunctional, rejected, abandoned, slavery, falsely accused, prison, forgotten. But heres the thing, while all this junk was thrown at Joseph, the theme of his life is that God was with him even through the circumstances that did not necessesarily show that. While Joseph was undergoing all these trials he did not just sit and whine, nor did he simply try to survive; he thrived, he lived his life and served others as God would have wanted him to. In addition, Joseph did not take the easy way out when things were hard, rather, he stuck to his morals, and to God's plan. When times are hard or we are down it is so easy to just take a "shortcut", or make an excuse. But look at Joseph, he stayed true to himself and his God when he was going through disappointment after disappointment, he did not play victim, but instead lived his life as he should amidst his trials. Last weekend I had a nice night to myself as I relaxed, baked for friends, watched 'spirit of the marathon', and journaled...here is what I wrote "I don't want to play victim to life's unexpected circumstances, I want to fight to keep living with joy, living life to the fullest, an using my gifts and passions even when it is hard or I am tired or disheartened. I want to run and live as if there is still triumph and possibility in my life, because there is, we don't have to let cancer ruin what is left of our time together, because there is a great possibility that we could be ruining many years to come! " Todays sermon convicted me even more so to really take those words "not play victim" even more seriously, so today I decided I am not playing victim to my family's circumstances, I am not using cancer as an excuse in my workouts, in my friendships, in schoolwork, in my attitude. I have not been using it as an excuse, but it has always been in my head that if I am having a bad day cancer is why, when really it was my own selfish CHOICE to be a grumpy downer. Also, I decided over break not to try to train for the marathon in track because I thought it was going to be too hard emotionally to fight through something else, I was actually afraid that I would let bad thoughts come in my head as I was running and it would just break my body down. But you know what, when I was running the half this weekend I was so focused I did not let negative thoughts ruin my pace, I had so much joy while running, it was like a gift from God telling me that I am so capable and strong to fight through anything, triumph over adversity and to fight through the rough periods thrown at you in life and in a race. SO HA take that cancer. While qualifying would have been a fun story, the lessons learned this weekend were so much better (however, in my book I say I qualified because on my GPS at 13.1 miles I was at 1:36, so I am throwing my own nationals marathon after graduation, who wants to join? ya i didnt think anyone else is crazy enough...i know im weird for enjoying running for days)
